Tuesday, February 10, 2015

"Inspiration"

I n the "Things I Miss About Mormonism" category, "inspiration" is pretty near the top. I put inspiration inside quotation marks because I still feel inspired by many things, I just don't feel it is as often. I love to teach. I love connecting with large groups of people on things we feel passionate about. I wanted to be a Relief Society teacher for my entire adult time in Mormonism. I substituted here and there and finally, after I had begun my faith transition, I was called to be a regular teacher. I did that for about a year and absolutely loved it. And then I stopped believing and lost the opportunity to teach Relief Society, Sunday School, Young Women's or anything. I miss it. I know I can recreate those types of things in my new lifestyle, it just isn't as easy. It's sort of like learning a new language as an adult. Or learning how to play the piano or something else. It takes time to be proficient. I began publicly speaking in church at the age of 5. So it was over 25 years of learning and teaching those lessons. It feels like starting over. It is starting over. And it's hard.

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