Thursday, July 05, 2012

H ow do you tell people you are getting a divorce? AND that you're happy? Especially in a culture where divorce is equated with the loss of eternity?

 I guess you do it like this: "Randal and I are getting a divorce. Everyone is happier. Please be happy with me. Do not offer condolences. If I tell you you don't have to be sorry, then don't be. If I'm sad or need help, I'll let you know. Otherwise, I'm good. I'm better than good. I'm at peace."

And it seems that some people are unsure if I'll want to hear from them during this time. I always want to hear from you. You can ask me anything. Seriously. You really can ask me anything. If I don't want to answer it, I'll tell you and I promise not to be offended (I'm pretty hard to offend anyway), if you'll do the same.

And you should know also, there was no infidelity, physical abuse, or anything else that might make it one person's fault or the other. Randal and I are still friends.

8 comments:

Erin said...

Love to you. (Move back to Ames!!)

Charmaine said...

Thank you Erin. (And I wish!)

Brittany Hall said...

I think you are so brave- I hope that I could do that if I was unhappy. If you don't mind my being nosy, what are your plans? Are the boys staying with you?

Susan Jo Ollerton Fuller said...

Charmaine you are amazing and I too am happy for you. Everyone deserves to be happy, healthy, cared for and normal. I'm not saying you weren't, just sayin. I love you so much and now we enter the next phase together as a family and friends.

Charmaine said...

Thanks Brittany. And I don't mind. As for plans, most are on hold until the divorce is final (in about 2 months). But school is a definite and probably a move (still close by though). Randal and I are sharing custody and parenting time of the kids and they seem to be doing really well with everything.

Charmaine said...

Thanks! :)

Melody said...

Charmaine, good for you for doing what's right for you and your family. I think you're brave too -- and strong. Hugs!

Jen Bear Baldwin said...

Good for you. I am still sorry to see how everything turned out, but I am glad you are moving on with your life.